Overly burdened women – Cathrine Chidawanyika Makuvise

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I love Twitter. It’s such a mixing pot of opinions, some I agree with and some I baulk at. I make different sounds of disgust, surprise, glee etc because this is how I react to reading things. My face just won’t make the effort.

So there I was scrolling down my timeline and I see someone giving a shout out to women who can date a man in progress, whatever that means. She goes on to say most women expect a finished product. Someone else then comes in to ask if the particular woman dating a man in progress is a project manager and derisive laughter actually escapes from my throat. Good one. Someone needs to invent holographic high fives or something like that. I’m over the constipated emoticons.

This narrative of “man-in-progress” is funny to me and not funny in a ha-ha way, but funny in a “you’ve got to be fucking kidding me” way.

When women enter into a relationship, they are expected to have their shit together, be ready to birth children, to be cook, mother, maid, chauffeur, itinerary keeper, etc and if she also happens to have a job then she should just know how to handle it. In addition to that, there’s a man or is that ma-child who needs building so women need to know how to do that as well.

So much is expected from women, everything in fact but we have set the bar so low for men that we ululate when they do the things they are supposed to. Slip up as a woman though, just fail at one thing and our entire sex is brought into question.

We are given a twisted pedestal where we should aspire to be if we must be found worthy. Do it all and we’ll admire you and other women will admire you. It doesn’t matter if there is nothing in it for you. There are no accolades to be found in that selfish mindset. So we do and do and do to earn their admiration and love which they won’t give. Not to us. And no surprise The fault is found in us, every single time. We are the glue that holds it all together so how come we couldn’t.

Did he step out?  Oh, honey, that’s what men do, as long as he comes back home to you. His business failed? Take care of your boo. Build him up, make him feel like a man. Did he snap and slapped you? Well, what did you do, watch how you address him. Don’t emasculate him. He is a child.

Okay, so he must be treated like a child-like I’m his mother but not emasculate him and treat him like a man yet be careful not to usurp his position as head of the household?

Wait, is there a scientific formula to this, because I CAN’T with the bullshit!